The Universe Is Closed!

 No, I don't mean it closed down for the night..., or for repairs..., I mean the Universe is a closed system that loops back on itself and forms  a gigantic bubble we call "Creation!'

The problem with determining the shape, and therefore the type of Universe we live in was the result of scientists claims that there was not enough baryonic (regular) matter to produce the gravity necessary to draw everything together but it seems (according to the Perspective Research Department) that new evidence suggests that between regular matter, interstellar dust and gas, dark matter and matter contained in black holes it is EXACTLY enough to close the Universe and make the birth and death of the Cosmos a cyclical and unending phenomenon! (The supposed increasing expansion of the Universe turned out to be an anomaly in certain calculations and has been discredited!)

We also wish to assure our readers that during this cycle it has been approximately 14 billion years since the current birth of the Cosmos... and another 26 billion years until everything collapses in on itself again... so there is no immediate need to panic!

We hope this essay lays to rest any false assumptions about the nature of our reality and rest assured that we are doing our best to protect humanity's precious bodily fluids! (PBF)

The way I see it anyway!