SUNDAY MORNING FUNNIES! Old age suits her!

 According to the information we received here at the Perspective Research Department the oldest living person in history was a French woman called Geraldine Dubois. 

She lived to the ripe old age of 122 years and 4 months! 

After numerous attempts to get a more complete picture of what this woman was like..., (since she lived in the majority of both the nineteenth and twentieth centuries) we pulled a few strings to get this picture of  Geraldine about an hour after she died..., and was waiting to be processed for entry to the Pearly Gates!

You don't think they would tell a 122-year-old woman that she wasn't allowed to smoke..., do you?

Another Day!

 

MORNING SEX!

 

HA HA BOOZE HUMOUR

 A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water.  As the bartender gives her the drink she says, "   I'm on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it's today.   "  

 

The bartender says, "   Well, since it's your birthday, I'll buy you a drink.  In fact, this one is on me.   "

 

As the woman finishes her drink, the woman to her right says,   "   I would like to buy you a drink, too.   "  

 

The old woman says, "   Thank you.  Bartender, I want a Scotch with two drops of water.   "  

 

"   Coming up,   "   says the bartender.    As she finishes that drink, the

man to her left says, “ I would like to buy you one, too.   "  

 

The old woman says, "   Thank you.  Bartender, I want another Scotch with two drops of water.   "   

 

"   Coming right up,   "   the bartender says.

 

As he gives her the drink, he says, "   Ma'am, I'm dying of curiosity. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?   "  

 

The old woman replies, "   Sonny, when you're my age, you've learned how to hold your liquor.  Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue.   "

*** 

 

Touché

 

Canadians are not the nice ones!

Is This Punny?

(For an encore they're going to do a "can-can'!)