Super Sunday Morning Funnies!

I started to work for a very rich guy, and after a while he was really surprised that everyone on his boat knew who I was.

“You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I know them,” I said.

My boss called me out, thinking I was bluffing, "OK, Dave, how about Elton John?"

"No worries boss, Elton and I are old friends, and I can prove it." Thinking I’m full of shit, flew us out to England and knocks on Elton John’s door, and Elton shouts, "Dave! What's happening? Great to see you! Come on in for a beer!"

Although impressed, my boss is still skeptical. After we leave Elton’s house, he tells me that he thinks that was just lucky.

"Fine, just name anyone else.”

"President Obama," he quickly retorts.

"Yup," I says, "Old buddies, since he was a Senator.” We hopped aboard his plane and off we went.

Shortly after arriving in DC, we spotted Obama at a restaurant. He saw me and motioned us over, saying, "Dave, what a surprise, I was just about to have lunch, you and your friend come on in and let's have a beer and catch up."

Well, my boss was a bit shaken by now but still not totally convinced. After we left the restaurant he still thought I was full of shit

“Name anyone, anyone in the world.”

"The Pope," he replied.

"Sure! I've known the Pope for years." So off we flew to Rome.

So we’re standing with the masses at the Vatican's St. Peter's Square. "This will never work,” I said. “I can't catch the Pope's eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I'll come out on the balcony with the Pope."

I headed towards the Vatican.

About, half an hour later I emerged with the Pope on the balcony. I headed back to my boss and found him surrounded by surrounded by paramedics.

"What happened?" I asked.

My boss looked up and said, "It was the final straw... you and the Pope came out on to the balcony and the man next to me said, 'Who the fuck is that on the balcony with Dave?”

Meanwhile, the pope is joined by Donald Trump... The Pope leaned towards Mr. Trump and said, "Do you know that with one little wave of my hand I can make every person in this crowd go wild with joy? This joy will not be a momentary display, like that of your followers, but go deep into their hearts and for the rest of their lives whenever they speak of this day, they will rejoice!"

Trump replied, "I seriously doubt that. With one little wave of your hand? Show me!"

And with that, the Pope slapped Drumpf in the face... and the land rejoiced!